Do you want more out of life? Are you looking to learn and grow in your confidence? Do you have desires to get a new job or trade in that car? Do you want to be in love?
If you are looking to have a more fulfilling life in any area, you are asking for change. I am truly fascinated by change because it is the thing we crave and the thing that repels us. Most of my life I have either invited change or avoided change. I (Traci) was talking to Kayla the other day and we discussed the word, adventurous. I have always thought of myself as an adventurous soul. On my dating profiles in the past I would highlight the word adventure as a main trait. Imagine my surprise when we were discussing the ins and outs of the description.
Kayla said that for her adventure means “adrenaline junkie” as in “likes to jump out of planes and climb high mountains and wake up in strange places”. I paused for a few minutes because what I know for sure… this isn’t me. I like new things. I like experiencing new things. In case you are confused like me, they are not the same. I like experiencing new things in style. I am not a camper or “glamper”. I like hotels and food that I can pronounce. So you see, awareness can be healing. This is really good information about who I am and how I want to experience the world. I can also adjust any future dating profiles 🙂
Liking new things is the same thing as liking change. I have always loved learning and applying information. I love exploring, from the safety of my own car, places around me. I like experiencing new things with some degree of safety (important distinction). I am learning more about myself in my 50’s than in my whole life. Funny how wisdom comes with age. It is important to know and understand our unique wants and desires so that when we are out there grabbing a dream, it is what WE WANT! We assume a lot, and you know what happens when we assume…
Looking back at my life over the years there is a consistent theme of change. Self induced change. You see, I like to up-level. I am forever pushing another floor button to go up in my elevator. I also have this other quirk, I like efficiency. I prefer things to be done well but also in a streamlined fashion. This is going to be very beneficial for you, because I share. When I am working with clients that want to up-level something in their life, or experience something new, I share all my short-cuts (not magic pill) to help them have the most efficient possible journey.
You see, change is hard because change is confusing. Change is scary because it is new. Change is daunting if we don’t know what we are doing. Change is difficult to plan because most of the journey is a mystery. Change is challenging because most can’t answer these questions:
What is it that you want?
What is your purpose?
What opportunity can I find for you?
What are you looking to do?
What are your qualifications?
What do you need?
Who are you today?
What is the one thing you have always wanted to do?
These are the questions we avoid or ask others to answer for us. We aren’t bad. We are confused. You may see a beautiful living room photo on Pinterest and think “that would be nice, one day.” But do you know what decorating style you prefer? Instead of chasing pretty pictures and pretty ideas, you need to figure out what YOU want.
Kayla and I have reinvented ourselves dozens and dozens of times. We are masters of change. We don’t always like change, but we understand the process and how to do this with grace and results. Why? Because we are fascinated with change. We practice change.
Back in 2012, I decided to start my own Meetup group in Sacramento, California. It was called the Downtown Women’s Club. It went from 100 people to over 4,000 people before I shut it down in 2016. I have been preparing to guide people my whole life, however, I noticed it most when I would take a group to San Francisco to urban hike. Not only would I take ladies from my area, I would organize it so that women from San Francisco could join us. I had a successful and beautiful experience every single time.
Here is what I had to do to prepare. I had to map out routes in San Francisco that I thought we be interesting to hike. I had to think of things like bathrooms and food along this route. I had to think of parking and how long it takes to get there and what the weather will be like. I would take my daughters and friends all the time to “practice” the routes. I found ways to see the city while making sure people were comfortable and felt taken care of. I made sure to bring along help. I trained leaders to help me so that no one was alone or not having anyone to talk to. You see strangers would sign up to come to these events and I understood how brave it was to join something new. I had to think of everything that could go wrong, or needs that were unusual. I have taken groups as large as 55 on these urban hikes, organizing carpool and a checklist of what to bring to make the experience seamless.
No one was left behind, everyone had fun, had access to what they needed and was able to experience the city in a way they have never been able to before. Most people are too scared to drive in a big city like San Francisco. You see having a guide, they were able to walk 8 miles all over the city and not worry about getting lost, getting a parking ticket, or getting in a bad area on accident. They didn’t have to think about how to get there, how to park, or where to walk. They did have to decide if they wanted to experience an urban hike in San Francisco. They felt safe.
This allowed them to enjoy the experience differently than if they tried to do it all on their own. It would take them hundreds of trips to the city to feel the comfort level that I do. I was raised there, have gone hundreds and hundreds of times over the years. I have experienced every positive and negative thing so that I know how to navigate in both situations. I am a master at guiding people in San Francisco, and I am a master at guiding people through the process of change, because I have done it hundreds and hundreds of times.
Change is also hard because if you are like me, you are waiting for everyone else to get it together so you have the time and resources when it is your turn. I have been the charter member of the “wishing, hoping and waiting” club. I have nicknamed this club as “waiting hell”. Because as you may have already figured out, no one has it all together at the same time and your time is never coming. We feel this in our soul. When we really allow ourselves to feel this reality, we lose hope and fall into a bit of despair and try really hard to tell ourselves it doesn’t matter. But it does matter and so do you. It is important to make that distinction.
When we decide that we want to experience something, like weight loss, or getting a new job, or to start dating, it is important to do something about it. Nothing feels worse than getting inspiration for a kitchen renovation 20 years from now. We can baby step, or jump all in, the pace is up to us, but we have to decide that in spite of what is going on in life, you have to be the priority in something. There is never a good time to have kids, trust me I have four daughters to prove that theory and yet I wouldn’t change a thing. There is never a good time to change or create a more meaningful life.
Can you answer all of the questions above? Do you want to be able to answer those questions? Most of cannot and that is ok. Perhaps it is time to start exploring more of who you are and what you want. Maybe you thought you were adventurous too, like me. We learn through experience, and so just like Runaway Bride, we might have to try a lot of eggs to figure out what kind we like. If you are tired of “waiting hell” and ready to make some change, you are in a good and safe place. The beautiful thing is that you don’t have to know the answers now before you start. You just have to be willing to look at the questions, the answers unfold as you go 🙂
We have additional blogs for you to read and a private podcast to listen to that has additional insight to help you understand more about change and some of the resistance we have to creating a more satisfying life.
Inspired Lifestyle Private Podcast
In this episode, I talk more about why change is hard and how to have more hope around change.
I invite you to explore around this website all dedicated to living an inspired life. If you have a question about change, please post a comment below and Kayla and I will be sure to respond.
xo Traci & Kayla